Axioms…from my perspective

normally, i dedicate thursdays to giving some of my personal life axioms…truth that, from my perspective, is self-evident. sometimes practical. sometimes philosophical. sometimes whimsical. but truth, no less.

“sometimes, no matter what you do, it won’t be good enough”

up until i was about 12 or 13, i was a yankee fan.  i used to idolize the great mickey mantle and whitey ford and yogi berra.  i had their baseball cards (i would be a rich man, if i would have kept all of them).  i even got to see a couple of games in the old yankee stadium when i was a kid.  it is a surreal memory for this life-long fan of the great game.

somewhere along the timeline of free agency, anti-trust laws, no salary caps and big market revenues, i lost my love of the yankees.

call it sour grapes.  call me a whiner.  tell me to pull up my “big boy” panties.  whatever.

when you have more money than anybody else, you get to buy yourself the best players.  a-rod, matsui, derek, tex, c.c., a.j.  and on top of that, you have the money for the best facilities, the best travel accommodations, the best training, the best equipment, the best stadium, the biggest marquee, the most fame and attention.

and that’s the point of this axiom.

the yankees won the world series last night.  ho hum.  they were supposed to win.  all of us small-market, small-minded whiner-complainers are never going to be satisfied…and we will never give the yankees their due.  to us, we minimize their effort and success by discounting it.  we cheapen their lopsided victories by saying, “what do you expect?  they’re supposed to win!  they bought the best players that money can buy!”

the yankees had a player payroll this year of $201 million.  my beloved san diego padres had a payroll of about $43 million.  what does that mean?  the more money you have, the better stuff you can buy.  it’s simple economics.  and yeah…i’m bitter.

but here’s the deal.  in the end, the 25 players the yankees played with still had to perform.  they still had to live up to their billing.  they had to hit better, throw better, catch better, run better, think better…than the other 29 teams…through 162 regular season games…two rounds of playoffs…and a best of seven world series.  and they did it.

just because you are supposed to be better, doesn’t always mean you are better.  this year, the yankees are the best.  but for most people, it will never be good enough.  if they would have lost, they would have been “under-achievers”.  by winning, all they did was what they were supposed to do.  for the yankees, it’s a no-win.

sometimes, no matter what we do…no matter how hard we try…no matter the effort, the heart, the motive, the intent…what we do will not be good enough for some people.

they will say we should have tried harder, done more, spent more time, given an extra day or an extra call or an extra dollar.  sometimes…for some people…our performance will never meet their expectations.  we will let them down.  they will blame us for failures that are not ours.  they will make us out to be scapegoats.  they will see us as over-paid, under-achieving disappointments.

sometimes, no matter what we do, it won’t be good enough.

take a moment right now and thank god that he doesn’t grade our performance the same way people do.

The long-awaited trip to Petco

no question.  petco park is the most amazing ballpark i have ever been to!

no.  it doesn’t have the history of yankee stadium or the old time ambiance of fenway or wrigley.

it’s never hosted the world series (yet) or the all-star game.  and before you start telling me the padres stink or some other lame, unrelated judgment, let me tell you of the petco greatness:

72 degrees at game-time…1:00 in the afternoon

cool, off-shore breeze throughout the game

view of coronado island out the back

stunning view of downtown san diego…unbelievable architectural symmetry

angles, angles, angles…

fish tacos, carne asada burritos, hunan chicken, barbeque ribs, and grilled hot dogs.  mmm…

$10 parking, one block away…and i didn’t break into a full sweat while i walked.

no fights breaking out in the stands.

the fish market at seaport village for dinner after the game.

who knows?  maybe the padres will be back in the world series in the next couple of years!

remember, i’m a padre fan.  a dreamer and a believer to the end!  always have been.  always will be.  loyalty is a virtue.

I don’t know what to title this post…

here are some possible titles:

“yankees suck!”

“rangers suck!”

“why i don’t drink alcohol”

“when grown men don’t grow up”

“the F word…perfect for every occasion”

i’m certain, by comparison, the obnoxiousness that occurred in my section of last night’s rangers-yankees contest was tame by new york standards.  not even close to what goes on throughout the whole of yankee stadium every game night. but for the genteel, southern-hospitality minided folks of arlington, this was a big night.

we had it all.  a myriad of obscene gestures.  taunting.  men calling each other “bi*ches”.  women with the wrong choice of clothing.  a frightened ranger hospitality host.  multiple security guards.  a few challenges to “take it out to the parking lot”.  F-bombs.  liquid stupidity flowing… i’m pretty sure the ranger concessions made a killing in our section.  a spit in the face.  a push down the stairs.  a bunch of grown men rushing a bunch of other grown men to defend the honor of their drunk bro.  four ejections.  and friends with a couple of nice guys in back of us.

for me, it was just another night at the ballpark.

for wanda, who  grew up in the home of an alcoholic,  it was not a good night.

we laughed and stared and ducked and avoided the conflicts that brewed (nice choice of words) for five or six innings.  we tried to watch the game (glad i’m not a real ranger fan…they got spanked by the pin stripes) and enjoy the company of our friends.

by the way, no one should ever go to a ball game in the midst of a high-fiber, fruit and vegetable “cleanse”…the ballpark hot dogs were screaming “eat me” all night…

without getting too philosophical, i think the thing i’m stuck with after last night is the depressing awareness that most people in life have nothing more than the events of their day to give them meaning and purpose…whether it be a ranger game, a beer, a fight, a hook up, a job, a new car, or whatever.

for me, it’s sad and challenging at the same time.  we are surrounded by brokenness on every side.  we rub elbows with all kinds of people everyday.  we walk in the midst of messy humanity.  are you looking?  are you listening?  do you care?

better yet, what are you doing about it?

A life lesson from baseball

last night i went to a high school baseball game.  pretty exciting game.  some good pitching, some shoddy fielding, a couple of timely hits, and a bunch of whining about how bad the umpires were.  yeah, it was a normal high school game.

on the way out, i was behind a dad and his son and another player.  they were from the losing team.  obviously, the losing team whined a lot louder about the umpire than the winning team…and this dad (as best as i could hear) was having the same conversation that parents of young athletes have all the time:

“…it’s not your fault.  there was no way you could hit with that kind of an umpire.  they stole the game from us.  how can anybody play with that kind of bias?  you couldn’t have any confidence in the strike zone.  those umpires took you out of your game.  blah. blah. blah.”

i will admit that i generally have a different take on the whole umpiring thing than most (in that one of my sons is an umpire), but i’ve also been the dad of athletes my whole life.  I have walked off the ball field many times, helping my sons face the reality of a loss.

i’ve also listened for years to parents make excuses for their kids, instead of helping them face reality.  on the ballfield…and also in life.

“it’s his fault.”  “you just got on the wrong team.” “we don’t have enough money.”  “your teacher isn’t being fair.”  “don’t the police have something better to do?”  “they’re giving way to much homework.”  “the administration is always showing favoritism.”  “they’re cheating the system.”

you get the picture.

parents, stop crippling your kids.  stop making excuses for them.  stop teaching them to make excuses.  we’re a culture of excuse givers.  it’s time to stop.

hey.  life is difficult.   don’t complain that you didn’t get get three perfect pitches.   sometimes you only get one good pitch to hit.  shut up.  swing your bat.  give it your best shot.  if you miss, go back to the bench and figure out what you did wrong and what you could do better.

there.

and if you think this post is about baseball, you just swung and missed.

It’s just the first eight games…

national tv audience, opening night of the new ball park in the big apple, prime time in every way and the little friars from san diego spoil the biggest night in baseball this season.  i love baseball.

i know it’s a long season, but 6-2, the best pitching stats in the bigs, guys that actually pay attention to their hitting coach, no choking on the main stage, and david eckstein…this is a good start.

Papiview

the legacy is officially continuing…

this past saturday, holden took in his first ball game.  at the ballpark in arlington, the home of the texas rangers.  that’s his daddy behind home plate.

how cool is this?

Manny being Manny

just found out on the news that manny went ahead and signed his contract with the hated dodgers for two years at $45 million.  he said he needed to settle for that amount because the economy is so rough right now.

thanks, manny.  may your sacrifice inspire us all.

i love baseball.  manny is one of the most entertaining and gifted baseball players i have ever witnessed.  i am one of his fans.  but this one just kind of torqued me this afternoon.

i feel better now.

i love baseball. i really do. but…

i’ve got a whole lotta opinions about this a-rod thing.   there are few people who have a greater love and respect for this game than i do.  i’m not saying i have more than others…just few that have more than i.  that’s just the way it is.

baseball, as i was raised with it, is dead.  it has been for years.  a 162-game season changed it.  the designated hitter changed it.  pete rose betting changed it.  steinbrenner’s wallet changed it.  technology changed it.  replays changed it.  and i’m a guy that’s not against change!

i love change.  i love change for change sake.  change keeps things fresh.  change moves us from good to better…and sometimes to best.  but not for baseball.  but i’m a realist.

i still love baseball.  i love the purity and the mysticism of the game.  i love the unwritten rules.  i love that you can look at the way a guy stands or holds his bat or adjusts his cup or how he takes care of his glove…and know whether he is a real baseball player or not.

the zen of baseball is ulitmately unexplainable, but absolutely knowable.  you’ve either got it or you don’t.

but baseball, as we know it, has changed.  it’s a business.  it’s entertainment.  it is the perfect sport wrapped in a contract.  we need to stop thinking it is more than that.  ballplayers are not role models.  they do not live for moral perfection.  we shouldn’t expect it from them.  they shouldn’t use steroids, but they shouldn’t be playing for ungodly amounts of money either.

in a sport driven by greed and not by the love of the game, why are we so picky about other sins…like cheating to get a competitive edge or betting on the side.  why are we not as uptight about the blatant racism in management or ballplayers who cheat on their wives with baseball groupies at away games or the heartless disregard of a young player who no longer performs as expected?  hypocrisy is everywhere.

i say leave a-rod alone.  he cheated.  he got caught.  he apologized.  he probably won’t do it again.  let him collect his bizillions and pay his alimony and drive his bentley and find a new supermodel or rock star to date.  sheesh.  he’s been through enough already…

real baseball is alive and well.  you just have to look for it carefully.  but it’s there.

I love Spring…

my favorite time of the year.  the smell of baseball is in the air and the padres are tied for first place.

hope…where would we be without it?

In praise of the sports metaphor

in honor of the start of football season, i thought i’d share with you some of my favorite sports metaphors that apply to life, leadership, relationships, discipleship and personal growth.  for those of you that don’t appreciate the well-timed (but not over-used) greatness of a sports metaphor, i would suggest spending a few evenings of watching back-to-back-to-back-to-back repeats of espn sportscenter.  it is a cure for many things…

one of my all-purpose favorites is keep your eye on the ball.  probably best known to a baseball hitter, it is a discipline that is taught in virtually every sport that is played with a ball.  football wide receivers, soccer goalies, golfers, tennis players, and other athletes all know that keeping their eyes on the ball is the most basic and fundamental of all steps to mastering their game.  focus on the basics must never be overlooked.

as an athlete, you can have mad skills, powerful muscles, a great reputation and unlimited potential, but if you lose sight of the ball, nothing else matters.  you will fail.  every time.  no debate.  case closed.

the same is true in life.  it is so easy to jump ahead and forget the basics.  we can lose concentration and easily lose sight of the simple and practical things we need to be doing everyday.  focus is essential in everything we do.  being able to narrow down our plan to the basics is the foundational step we have to take before we take any other steps.

where have you lost focus?

what part of your life needs to be brought back to basics?

what’s stopping you from keeping your eye on the ball?

what are you going to do about it this week?

stay connected here this week.  the sports metaphor will “raise the bar”…