Are you friendly or a friend?

i know you can’t be close with everybody.  there’s only so many people we can accommodate in our lives.  so don’t misunderstand what i’m going to say right now…

i’m grateful for friendly people.  it beats having to deal with people who are acting like butt-heads.  but being friendly is not enough.  not by a long shot.  and there’s a huge difference between being friendly and being a friend.  let me contrast:

  • friendly is cordial.  a friend is genuine.
  • friendly can be faked.  a friend doesn’t need to.
  • friendly can still ignore you’re in the room.  a friend seeks you out.
  • friendly is the absence of conflict.  a friend resolves conflict.
  • friendly is oblivious to what other’s are really feeling.  a friend is intuitive.
  • friendly acts like everything’s okay.  a friend is makes sure it is.
  • friendly does small talk.  a friend talks from the heart.
  • friendly does not disclose.  a friend is an open book.
  • friendly can leave you wondering.  a friend always lets you know where you stand.
  • friendly doesn’t necessarily want you as a friend.  a friend is never satisfied without friendship.
  • friendly avoids saying the hard things.  a friend digs deep and takes the risk.
  • friendly is there during the good times.  a friend perseveres during the bad.
  • friendly is conditional.  a friend is unlimited.
  • friendly is guarded.  a friend is free.
  • friendly can be cool.  a friend is warm.
  • friendly acts happy to see you.  a friend seeks you out.
  • friendly can walk away.  a friend comes back.
  • friendly will point you to help.  a friend will be there for you.
  • friendly acts interested in what you are doing.  a friend really is interested.
  • friendly will talk about the past and the present.  a friend will talk about the future.
  • friendly can live with mediocre.  a friend pushes for the best.
  • friendly talks about things.  a friend talks with you.
  • friendly talks about themselves.  a friend wants to know how you are doing.
  • friendly moves on.  a friend doesn’t forget.
  • friendly replaces friends.  a friend stays a friend.
  • friendly enjoys shallow.  a friend calls to deep.
  • friendly won’t acknowledge hurt.  a friend shows scars.
  • friendly suppresses anger.  a friend expresses honestly.
  • friendly says they’ll pray for you.  a friend actually does.
  • friendly knows how to talk.  a friend knows how to feel.
  • friendly expects me to change.  a friend accepts me as i am.
  • friendly remembers, but overlooks.  a friend forgives.
  • friendly looks into your eyes.  a friend sees into your heart.

friendly knows there’s an elephant in the room, but acts like it’s not really there.  a friend hops on the elephants back and asks you to join in taking it down.

friendly is ok.  but i’ll take real friendship any day.

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2 thoughts on “Are you friendly or a friend?

  1. I was thinking that this list makes having a friend more complicated but at the same time it sure makes being a friend more ginuine. And why fake being friendly? Just be a friend or don’t be one! I really do enjoy the list.

  2. Webster – Friend: someone you know, like, and trust.
    In light of this a friend will be some one you experience fun, fights, and forgiveness with. The absence of one leaves question.

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