here’s a little test you can take with your partner…or pass on to someone who could use the insight.
part of growing together and building depth and maturity in our marriages is to be honest…ruthlessly honest…with our evaluation of how we are doing together. it’s not enough to know how we personally feel about it. we’ve got to know how our partner perceives it, too.
here are twenty statements for you to respond to. “1” means you completely disagree with the statement. “5” means you totally agree with the statement. take it separately and then compare your answers. get some dialogue going.
|How we’re doing…||1||2||3||4||5|
|Each of us totally respects the other…|
|Each of us likes the other…|
|Each of us finds pleasure and comfort in the other’s company…|
|We give emotional support to each other…|
|We have mutually satisfying physical intimacy…|
|We express our appreciation of each other…|
|We have worked at creating fond memories…|
|We have the feeling of trust, friendship, and safety in our relationship…|
|We are central to each other’s world…|
|We have deep admirations of the positive qualities in each other…|
|We both possess a strong sense of morality…|
|We feel like the problems we have are surmountable…|
|We both recognize that each of us is special in some important regard…|
|Our marriage enhances both of us…|
|We uniquely fit and meet each other’s needs…|
|We are really fortunate to have each other…|
|The division of household tasks and childbearing is shared equally…|
|The success of our marriage is shared equally…|
|We both share positive and negative emotions in a healthy manner…|
|We both believe that marriage takes constant attention and work…|