My heart is bleeding…

i can’t help myself.   my inner padre is now trying to ooze out and embrace my dallas cowboy fan friends.   this terrible, horrible, no good, very bad…and getting worse by the moment…season the little wadesters are having right now is nearly causing me to lose sleep.

i feel like i need to do something.   i wish i could go give wade a hug.   red jesus, too.    i would even be willing to share some of the pain killers i take for my knees with tony romolicious.   at least a few of them.

but i realize i can’t really help the team.   they are way out of my league…although if wade or jerry asked my opinion,  i think i could get the little wadesters back on track right away.   no…i think the main help i can be is for the wadester nation…the throngs cow faithful that expected so much,  only to be let down so hard.

first off,  let me point you to a previous post that helped all of you rangerettes  (both longsuffering and bandwagoners) make it through the last week of the regular season…and catapulted you into the playoffs and now, to the big kahuna of pro baseball:  the world series.   i’m sure without my sage wisdom and timely padre advice,  many of you would have ended your lives long before you reached the promised land.   no thanks is necessary.   you are my friends.

here’s the link,  in case you need it.   there are many you that share dual citizenship in wadesterville and washingtonia… so you will understand the commonalities of advice to both your locations:   HERE’S THE LINK.

secondly, let me give you ten reasons not to fret.   ten reasons to be hopeful for the future.   ten reasons to have confidence that your boys will soon be back on top:

  1. you have the best stadium.   the deathstar has no equal…no rival…no competition.   the best stadium deserves the best team.
  2. wade will be gone.   although this will make me personally very,  very sad,  i think most of you will be throwing the party you wished you had gone to in 1999.   we will need to rename the team, though.   no more little wadesters… a name i am fond of.   what do you think about the little chuckies? how about red jesus’ disciples? just thinking…
  3. the ghost of tom landry.   it’s a new stadium,  but the ghost is there.   the hat will be back.
  4. if this season keeps going south,  you stand a great chance of getting the #1 pick in the draft.   andrew luck out of stanford is projected to be better than bradford at qb.   things are looking up already.
  5. the local sports talking heads are going to run out of negative things to say.   they have to.   the spewing will end eventually and the good, positive energy will start flowing.   it’s happened before.   it will happen again.
  6. after the rangers win the series,  jerry’s narcissistic ego will be ready to explode.   his need to be center stage will be all-consuming and he will personally drag the team up to the championship podium.   yes,  he has that kind of power.
  7. i’ve heard jimmy is thinking about a comeback.
  8. this is texas!! football is ours!   nobody has more of a right…nobody is more deserving…nobody gets to claim it as the national pastime…but texas! the balance of nature will continue to be thrown off-center until the cowboys are back on top.   the economy will not be balanced.   the problem of global warming will not be solved.   free-range dolphins will continue to be plagued.   jack bauer will not return.   weeds will still ravage my front lawn.   all of this…and more…will be with us like the ten plagues in egypt…until jerry’s boys reign again.   it has to be soon.
  9. T.O.’s gone…dave campo has the coolest hair around…your still america’s team…brett favre will surely retire this year…the chargers obviously pose no threat…the jumbotron is freakin’ awesome (yeah, i said it!)…parity, parity, parity…TU might be down for a while…it’s almost been 20 years…
  10. the momentum that is being generated by the mighty molina’s will linger long after the baseball season is over and the aroma of championship will be so intoxicating here in the great state…well, let’s just say i can already see jerry’s big ol’ smile shining from arlington.   here’s to 2011!

from my inner padre to yours…

12 thoughts on “My heart is bleeding…

  1. Heard on the way home tonight on WBAP:

    Did you hear about the old boy in Dallas trying to sign up Cowboys players to be pall bearers at his funeral??

    He wanted the Cowboys to let him down one last time.

    Of course I could say the same thing about my Broncos (THE RAIDERS!!!) and your Chargers, Mike…

  2. This was a great post. I would like to say that i thought the cowboys hit the bottom a few years ago?
    I like the cowboys for who they are now. Their championships are meaningless to me. I just want to see a team win. There is no heritage that was past on to me from their glory days.

    I wonder how full Arlington stadium will be when it’s 120 degrees in august and Rangers record. is 20 games under .500? I bet I can make a quilt with the alcs shirts in a couple of years.

    I wonder how many people are saying now to who ever they are talking to.” I have been a Ranger fan longer than you have.”

  3. I’m not. I’m totally a bandwagonner. I only like to see teams win, I admit it. But I like the idea of a World Series in texas. pretty cool.

    I hate football. But it’s still pretty sad to see the cowboys lose like they are. I feel like it’s all the more sad when I don’t care, and it’s STILL sad. That’s alot of sadness.

  4. Brandon – I have been a Ranger fan since the beginning and I will still attend a game next year in August in 120 degree heat even if they are 20 games below 500. I have never had expectations of this team and therefore am never disappointed, but can always be surprised and ecstatic, which I am now, even after last night’s ugliness. But I think they have a better shot now than they ever have with the new owners. Come on… You know Nolan, you think he’s gonna hang with a bunch of losers???

    Cowboys – Cowboys – yeah… for 40 years I’ve been watching them. This is the MOST disgusting group of players I’ve ever seen. Even when they were 1-15 I wasn’t that disgusted. A bunch of overpaid primadonnas who expect someone to hand the trophy to them. No, it doesn’t work that. Wade has got to go. I would prefer Jerry went, but I don’t think that will ever happen. It inflates his ego too much.

  5. Sherri you have the right idea on your faith to a team. Don’t get too down when they lose don’t sell your baby to get tickets to the WS. I see a lot and I mean lots of acquaintances that are now running around with antlers on their foreheads.

    I remember just a couple of years ago, I heard people complain about how far away the stadium is, It’s Hot, the team stinks, etc.

    I guess what gets me is I never knew how die hard Ranger fans my acquaintances were. Really?? why didn’t we go to more games in the past.

    Oh and the FEAR THE BEARD is way cooler than the antlers!

    please note. I am the only one who has a beef with the Rangers. My home city wants to see the Rangers win, not because of any player but Houston wants to see Ryan get a ring.

  6. and to be honest, I think my baby would sell me if she could to get tickets to the WS. That poor child still wants to go to a Texas game for her birthday…

    noooooo, the claw and the antlers are the best thing because a freaking minor leaguer thought it up and he’s not even playing. Texas needed something to bring them together and if that’s it, then that’s it. I’ll take it. The beard looks STUPID. and I mean, this is Texas.. who wants a beard, it’s freaking 120 degrees 10 months a year. I can’t believe Francoeur still has his.

    and yes, Houston and LA should want Nolan to get his ring.. he deserves one.

    and back then if you had been asking me and/or Larry to go to a game, if finances permitted, we would have been there. I don’t believe I’ve ever said it’s too hot for a ball game.

  7. So Mike, you’re saying that the economy will not recover until the Cowboys are back on top? That’s been the source of all of this? oh no…. how do we deflate Jerry’s ego so equilibrium came come back to our fine nation? How, tell me how? I’ll do it!!!

  8. Hope, Change and the Cowboys no longer sucking. Maybe Obama can put that on the side of his jet in 2012. Will make for one heck of a logo!

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