Marriage Tuesday…is back.

last summer…on july 19,  to be exact…i put marriage tuesday down for a nap.

for those of you who are new readers since that time,  let me explain.   for a couple of years,  i wrote nearly every tuesday on the topic of marriage.   sometimes it was deep.   sometimes controversial.   sometimes funny.   but always about marriage from my perspective.

nine months ago,  the well kinda dried up.

but i’m back…and ready to toss some things out there that might be helpful to your marriage again.   every tuesday.   and i hope you’ll throw your two cents in.

so i want to start off with a few questions…

  • what do you really believe about marriage?
  • why is marriage such an important thing?
  • where did the idea of marriage come from?
  • do we get to define what marriage is…or is there an objective definition outside of us?
  • what makes a marriage?
  • does marriage have a purpose?
  • whose marriage do you really admire?  why?
  • under what circumstances do you believe divorce is the answer?
  • have you read any good books on marriage?
  • what part of marriage are you really good at?
  • what parts do you stink at?
  • do you intentionally work at making your marriage better?
  • where do you go for help when your marriage is struggling?

i could write dozens more questions.   for tonight,  though,  my answers are not important.   what is important is whether you are asking those  (and all the other) questions…and working at finding the answers.   for yourself.   for your marriage.   for your future marriage.

i won’t apologize.   i think wanda and i have a great marriage.   we’ve been at our relationship for 42 years  (37 married).   it may sound cliche,  but she is my best friend…as i am hers.   this isn’t because  we default into it by simply living under the same roof for so long.   we actually have a lot of great friendships.   but nothing like the one we have with each other.

we are not perfect.   we have each made mistakes.   but we have learned.   we don’t make up our own ground rules for marriage.   we submit ourselves to a greater source.   we are still learning and growing.   and we have experience to pass on.

if you have some issues that you think we ought to address here on marriage tuesday,  pass them on.   we’ll deal with them.   if you have questions about marriage,  bring them up.   we’ll dialogue right here

i don’t know about you,  but i’m glad marriage tuesday is back.


6 thoughts on “Marriage Tuesday…is back.

  1. Biggest lie perpetrated about marriage – that is is 50/50. Marriage is hard, it’s a choice – sometimes daily, sometimes moment by moment. Most days we are lucky if it is a 60/40 proposition and it is irrelevant who is the 60 and who is the 40. Some times it is 90/10 and 100/0 – those are the times where the “d” word creeps in and you have to go back to the main question which is not “what is the foundation of your marriage, but WHO?” We’ll be celebrating 21 years in December and embarking on some major life changes to boot – but the one thing that has never changed is God is truly our foundation – He is not the third wheel He is the hub. Glad to see Marriage Tuesday is back!

  2. Late on replying, but I’d love to have a conversation about family boundaries. It seems like ever since we got married, Chris and I have constantly had to define and enforce boundaries with our extended families on both sides, and it is as taxing on us as it probably is on them. How can you get it through some thick skulls that we can be married and have our own lives without being oddly attached to, or oddly distant from, our families? How can we handle the difficulties of managing these relationships as a united force? How can we support each other when we have to say difficult things to people we love? What happens when one side of the family seems to simply not like one of the spouses? Talk about stress in a marriage!

  3. Also, Chris thinks there should be premarital counseling for extended families. So your parents, etc. can get their act together and come to grips with your marriage. Does such a thing exist?

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