Marriage Tuesday

you know, i write these “marriage tuesday” things just about every week, and every week, i get to remind myself how important marriage is to me.  not just my marriage, but all marriage.

i don’t take lightly the battle for marriage that is going on in our culture these days.  it’s deep and complex and like every battle, the generals and commanders on each side are calling for their loyalists to stand up and be counted.

but let me challenge you to take a step back from the culture war and listen…

are you fighting as hard for the quality and depth of your marriage, as you are for theology and ideology?  you know, when we talk about biblical marriage, we’re talking about way more than gender issues!

there is not much about life that makes for good marriage…but it does make for a good fight.  time is your enemy.  schedule is your enemy.  money is your enemy.  your kids…and their schedules are your enemies.  your house is your enemy.  sheesh…your lawn is the enemy.

work, education, recreation, possessions, people, television, the internet, church, whatever…hardly anything is your true partner in the battle for your marriage.  there are few, if any, natural alliances.  and they aren’t  necessarily bad things.  but even so, they each have their way of chipping away at the foundation of your marriage.

and if you’re not fighting for your marriage, you’ll lose the battle.

the one that really matters.

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5 thoughts on “Marriage Tuesday

  1. Marriage is such a battle Mike…Larry and I have been so blessed to have a strong relationship and successful marriage…I have over the years seen more and more the importance of praying for your spouse…even before you know who your spouse will be…I don’t remember if I read it or someone said it…but they were praying for their children’s spouse’s from the time their children were young…that made such and impression on me…I have preached it to my own children to pray for their future spouse and to take time…Larry and I continue to pray for our children and their spouses and fiances…I really enjoy your post…thanks…and your sermon on Sunday really hit home for me…thanks…God bless you.

    1. geneva…it has been great to have you and larry don and your whole family join with ours at north point! thanks for the encouragement…

  2. Mike, this is a great message and reminder to tend to our marriages especially when 50% of these marriages have or will end in divorce. Like you and Wanda, David and I have been married for many years (36 in September) and we feel blessed to be married to our best friends. Raising our 4 kids has been the greatest thrill ride of our lives and we look forward to the day there are grandchildren running happily through the house!

    You are so right about the ‘enemies’ to marriage…but as I grow older, they rear their ugly heads a little less often than they once did.- David has is gardener, I have my ‘Amazing Grace’ once every two weeks to clean the house. David has is USC and Dodger Tickets and I have my manicures and pedicures. My point is that we have learned to lighten each others load a little and appreciate each other more. David and I also have a 130 mile round trip commute together EVERY weekday. Lots of opportunities to discuss the issues of the day, the kids, the hurts, to argue, to laugh. And sometimes, to just to be quiet. The ‘enemies’ don’t show themselves as often as they did when I was a frenzied young wife and mom. But there are still a few that like to hang around and even some new ones to boot! I am reminded by your message to be ever vigilant in this marriage relationship.

    While I know you are not addressing the ‘culture war’ re marriage equality, I find it impossible to NOT address it when I think about this message of battling and fighting for my own marriage. Because if I don’t fight for marriage equality, then the reality is my marriage, my right to marriage, is at risk as well. Inequality is an ENEMY to ALL of us and our marriages. When we don’t allow a particular group of Americans the same and equal rights under the law today, then tomorrow it could be us.

    “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”
    Martin Luther King Jr., Letter from Birmingham Jail, April 16, 1963

    Thank you again for your timely message. Lots of love to you and Wanda.
    Beckie

    1. beckie…it seems like just yesterday we were young couples doing youth ministry together and trying to figure out how to be married and raise families at the same time! you and david were definitely made for each other. and you don’t fool me…you’re a trojan and dogger fan, too. it’s not just you’re husband! thank you for your kindness and encouragement and it’s good to still be friends after all these years. my best to david, too. farra

  3. So true – time is your enemy. schedule is your enemy. money is your enemy. your kids…and their schedules are your enemies. your house is your enemy. sheesh…your lawn is the enemy. I could add a couple more…but… 🙂 Nobody likes to be at the bottom of the list and that EVERYTHING else is more important then them.

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