I’m not a recent convert. I didn’t jump on the bandwagon a few years ago when they got Chris Paul. When the Clippers moved from Buffalo to San Diego in 1978, I was hooked.
(I actually still have a fondness for the Houston Rockets because they were originally established in SD until they relocated to Texas in 1971. I saw Elvin Hayes and Calvin Murphy in San Diego uniforms when I was in high school. Take that bada@@…)
I was never a Donald Sterling fan. To me, he was just a rich lawyer who bought the Clippers…then flaunted his power by moving them to his hometown of Los Angeles. I was crushed. Anywhere but LA…
After 35 years of owning the team, all he’s ever won is the title of “Worst Owner in the History Professional Sports”. Take that, Jerruh. His latest bout with media-exposed bigotry is merely icing on the cake…and not worth my commentary. I’ll simply let him continue to speak for himself. Sad. So Sad.
However, he did say something worth pointing out.
In his televised interview with Anderson Cooper, he said something that most everybody is guilty of saying: “Please forgive me.” It’s definitely the favorite go-to line for anybody caught screwing up.
- Stupid boyfriends: “Please forgive me.”
- Insensitive husbands: “Please forgive me.”
- Wives who fail their husbands: “Please forgive me.”
- Shamed public officials: “Please forgive me.”
- Disgraced Pastors: “Please forgive me.”
- Humiliated celebrities: “Please forgive me.”
- Discredited bosses: “Please forgive me.”
- Embarrassed employees: “Please forgive me.”
- Guilt-ridden parents (to their children): “Please forgive me.”
Let me just say this…No. No. No. No.
We can ask God to forgive our sins. He can handle it. It is impossible to emotionally manipulate him. He is not subject to our drama. His memory of our past sin is short, if not entirely non-existent. We cannot make Him feel guilty. And He has the power to give us the forgiveness we need most of all.
However, people are different. When you have committed an offense or wrongdoing in the eyes of another, you have no right to ask them to forgive you. You have no right to place that responsibility on them. You have no right to make dealing with your sin, their problem.
Let’s be clear. God requires that we forgive lavishly, abundantly, quickly and completely…for our own good, for their good, and for the good of all those we rub elbows with. If we fail to forgive, we will be held accountable. By God.
On the other hand, if you are the one that sins against another…if you screw up…if you hurt somebody…if you break a promise…if you are guilty of a trangression… here is your plan when you meet the one you have wronged:
Confess (acknowledge) what you did wrong and you know it affected them. Say you’re sorry for what you have done. Mean it. Commit to them that it won’t happen again (to the best of your ability).
Then give them space and time to forgive you when they are ready.
Anything more than that is manipulative and unfair.
Whew. I feel better now. Time for bed.